From the Husband

Diane & John

Hi!  I’m John, Diane’s husband, and I have the honor of being Diane’s first guest blogger. 

I like the name of Diane’s website and upcoming book, Fit to the Finish, because it is very descriptive of her.  One of the things I admire about Diane is her ability to finish what she starts, especially since I am a chronic procrastinator.  No matter what she sets her mind to, she stays on task until it is done.  Diane never dabbles in anything–she masters it.  Over the years I have seen her learn quilting, scrapbooking, photography, refinishing and upholstering furniture, and of course blogging.  But the one thing she could not seem to master was weight loss.

Early in our marriage, when the pounds began to mysteriously appear, Diane tried different diets.  Unfortunately, she was not able to stick with anything.  The big meals, desserts, and snacks continued unabated—I should know, I was right there with her stuffing my own face!  But honestly, I always thought of her weight gain as temporary, because I knew it was something that bothered her a lot.The extra weight didn’t change my feelings for Diane at all.  To me she was the same wonderful woman I married, but I knew all  the extra weight was having a deep impact on her self-esteem.  Diane had always cared about how she looked and enjoyed being on the go.  But when she became heavy, she was less concerned about her appearance and she limited her activities, often sitting on the sidelines or staying home.  As her clothing size increased, the selection of clothing options decreased, and she had to resort to making her own clothes.  To save money, she would buy clearance fabric (never the most attractive colors or prints).  I remember one jumper she made that was purple and blue with a fish pattern (yes, it was as bad as you are picturing).  She had spilled bleach on it and ruined it.  A few days later, I met her and the kids for lunch at the mall and she was wearing it!  I asked her why and she said, “It’s fine.  Besides, no one looks at me anyway.”

When the scale announced that Diane had hit over 300 lbs., she set her will to doing what it took to lose weight.  Unhealthy or dangerous foods were banished from our house (darn).  To my dismay, the Oreos, Breyers ice cream, and chips were gone.  It was as if she had put a lock on her mouth.  She could not be enticed to deviate from her plan.  Sometimes I tried to get her to share my guilt in some gluttonous indulgences, but to no avail.  Once, at a child’s birthday party, the mother offered us a big slice of cake with the requisite mound of ice cream, and pointed us to the savory treats at the “adults’ table.”  I gladly took my plate and then heard Diane say, “No thank you.”  I did a double take and looked at this woman who had always joined me in consuming such tasty treats in bulk, but was now politely refusing some of her favorite foods.  I knew then that she was serious.  She became almost annoyingly tenacious about exercising.  No matter what the weather was like, or even if we were on vacation, the girl was going to walk.  And sure enough, the pounds began to come off.  This is not to say that it was an easy journey and that she didn’t stumble at times, but her determination returned and she was back on track.  I could tell, she really wanted to lose weight.

At the time, I called Diane “the incredible shrinking woman.”  I enjoyed watching the reactions of family and friends when they saw her transformation.  It was great to see her buying new clothes and having more energy.  One of my favorite memories was at Sea World where she was invited from the audience to participate in the Shamu whale show.  When the show was over, she leaned over and whispered to me, “They never would have asked me if I had still been fat.”  Seeing the look in her eyes made me realize how she had always felt about her weight problem and how much being overweight it had hurt.  It brought tears to my eyes, I was so happy for her that she had reached her goal of being fit. (Read that whole story here.)

In so many ways, Diane is my hero.  When I face temptations in my life or think I can’t accomplish something, I remember the commitment she made to herself and her unflinching resolve.  In dealing with my own weight issues, her example showed me, that no matter how many diets, gimmicks, or good intentions you have for getting fit, until you set your will  and make deep down commitment, is isn’t going to work.  Do you have that resolve in your journey?  John

41 thoughts on “From the Husband

  1. Yum Yucky says:

    Hi John! The phrase “Fit to the Finish” makes me thinks of the words: strength, diligence, and passionate desire. Diane is obviously all of these things to accomplish the amazing things that she has.

    I’m going to tape that phase to my forehead. Err, okay maybe my mirror, and be inspired everyday by Diane’s words!!

    What an awesome pic of you two!

  2. Lance says:

    You have an amazing life partner, and one who has shown truly what commitment and dedication can mean! What a great example Diane is of the words “fit to the finish”! And so awesome that you see her as a hero!! Great to hear this from your perspective.
    .-= Lance´s last blog ..Sunday Thought For The Day =-.

  3. Marisa (Trim The Fat) says:

    John, your love, admiration and support for Diane is so special. I thought I was her biggest fan, but you definitely take the cake, uh, carrot!!! Seriously, so wonderful of you to support all of her efforts!

    Hope you are having a good trip, Diane 🙂

  4. Jody - Fit at 51 says:

    John, such a great thing to hear from your side all about Diane! To me, reading about her life has showed me how amazing a woman she is & your support is also part of that! To have a person by your side no matter what is so key in the whole process. What a great hubby! Fit to the Finish is interesting to me as I have found there is no finish but just an ongoing process that changes with time & life. But even so, it says Diane is with it no matter what & no matter what the finish is. I am so glad to have found her blog & really awesome to hear from you!

  5. Hilary says:

    I love hearing from bloggers’ family members! Somehow it feels like getting an illicit “inside scoop” on who the blogger “really is.” In this case it all lines up perfectly with who Diane has presented herself to be—honesty all around! I love it :). Thank you for posting, John.
    .-= Hilary´s last blog ..Happy Halloween! =-.

  6. Lara (Thinspired) says:

    Hi John!
    It is so nice to hear from you and hear Diane’s story from your perspective. You seem like a wonderfully supportive spouse. You and Diane are lucky to have each other!
    And Diane, I had no idea about the book deal…how wonderful!
    .-= Lara (Thinspired)´s last blog ..Bringing Down the Haus =-.

  7. Joania says:

    WOW!!! John, I’m truly impressed with you and your support, devotion and obvious love for Diane. Our journeys become just a bit easier when we have such wonderful support in our corner! Who better to be her number one cheerleader!!

    I very much enjoyed reading this post! Great job

    BTW, fantastic pic of you too!! 🙂
    .-= Joania´s last blog ..Weigh-in Saturday ~ Week 46 =-.

  8. Melissa says:

    You are a great guest blogger! I am so impressed with your support of Diane. I know from experience that the weight loss journey can be hard on a hubby who still wants to eat all the “bad” stuff and it sounds like you had a great attitude throughout the whole thing. 🙂
    .-= Melissa´s last blog ..It’s Over…now who wants the candy… =-.

  9. Janet says:

    Diane is truly lucky to have such a supportive and encouraging partner. You read so many stories about people that have to deal with friends and family that try (intentionally or not) to sabotage their weight loss efforts. Or husbands that don’t want to change their own eating patterms to support their wive’s new goals…
    .-= Janet´s last blog ..Day 168 – Great Halloween and Bunny Pics =-.

  10. Leah says:

    Hi John!

    I enjoyed reading your perspective of Diane’s journey. Very well written. Diane is blessed to have you for support and encouragement. I’m sure you will both enjoy many more years together encouraging other to love their spouses no matter what and showing them what it is to support each other through thick and thin. (pun slightly intended. *giggle* )

    Also, I also love how she’s chosen “Fit to the Finish”, because I’m always reminded she didn’t give up and won’t give up until the absolute end. Glory!

    .-= Leah´s last blog ..Halloween =-.

  11. brenda says:

    It’s so nice to meet you John! It was great getting YOUR point of view of Dianes journey to getting fit and healthy! I would say she is blessed to have you in her life, but also you are blessed having her in your life too 🙂
    .-= brenda´s last blog ..Fingerprint Friday =-.

  12. Amy says:

    Great guest post! I can’t imagine doing this without the support of my husband. I think often of my mother who not only doesn’t get much support from my dad, but often has to struggle against him in her efforts to slim down. I look forward to my “Shamu” moment; rather than feeling like a whale 🙂

  13. Sandi says:

    I loved reading your husband’s post! This cracked me up..”almost annoyingly tenacious about exercising”… I know my husband has felt the same many times. He called me the incredible shrinking woman as well! It’s wonderful to have a supportive husband. Congrat’s to you Diane, he’s a keeper!

  14. Tammy says:

    Hi John!!! So glad you guest posted…how awesome!! I love that Diane had a loving, supportive husband along the way…some of us don’t!! It’s cool to hear things from your perspective….and it was cool that you mentioned tearing up when you realize just how deep of an affect the burden of carrying the extra weight had on her. It’s so much more than just extra physical pounds. It’s cool that you get that, and shared it. 🙂
    .-= Tammy´s last blog ..Monday’s Food Pics =-.

  15. Fran says:

    It’s 6.30 am in the morning while I’m reading this and emotional already before the day even starts.

    What a beautiful post and even though it’s words on a screen you can feel the love you have for Diana through the screen. She’s blessed with you and as I read it you’re blessed with her.
    .-= Fran´s last blog ..A day in my life: Sunday November 1 2009 =-.

  16. Kat says:

    John, thank you for your post. It is clear that you and Diane have a strong and solid relationship. It helps so much to be each others heros. Diane is an inspiration to me…:-)

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