♦The good old fashioned rubber band trick – you know that one – you slip a rubber band through the buttonhole for the pants and then thread the loop over the button. Guaranteed to give you another inch in the waist as long as the rubber band doesn’t pop. (I learned that pony tail holders are stronger.)
♦The wet the waistband and upper hip trick – this one I liked a lot and used it in conjunction with the rubber band. I’d dampen the waistband and several inches below slightly. I then pulled and yanked on the pants as they dried. This seemed to give me some breathing room.
♦The cut the elastic in your tights and knit pants trick. This worked as long as all the elastic didn’t come sailing out.
♦The stretch your shirt over your knees trick. Take one too tight t-shirt, sit down and stick your knees into it. This gave me a good amount of hip room.
♦The it’s out of style trick. I’d just claim that some article of clothing was out of style and buy a new shirt or pair of pants in a larger size. No one was the wiser. . .
♦I even tried to trick myself into thinking my pants hadn’t really gotten bigger, rather they had shrunk in the dryer. (Not that I ever dried my pants – they were always line dried so as to avoid extra shrinkage.)
Of course even when I was employing all these tricky tricks I knew I wasn’t fooling anyone. Not myself – not my husband – and certainly not my friends who saw me on a daily basis. Anyone with eyes could see that I was getting bigger and bigger. No amount of clothing trickery was going to make anyone believe otherwise.
I suppose it came down to the fact that I was really trying to lie to myself that it was the clothing’s fault that I needed to use a rubber band at the waist. Surely the five times I swung through the McDonald’s drive-thru in one week didn’t make any difference in the fit of my clothing. It was just the clothes or maybe water weight.
As I gained more and more weight even I couldn’t convince myself that trickery was working. I then began trying to convince myself that I was getting so big because of a failed metabolism or some other medical issue. I even went so far as to have a thorough check-up – just convinced that I needed to go on some kind of medication. I didn’t. And of course now I’m glad that I didn’t have an underlying medical condition.
What I had was an eating problem.
All the clothing tricks in the world couldn’t camouflage that. It wasn’t until I came face to face with myself one day and knew I needed to really change my lifestyle did I give up the clothing tricks. Changing my relationship to food involved not only the food choices I made on a daily basis, but also coming to terms with the fact that I needed to be honest with myself about my appearance and my size.
As I lost weight I had to employ other clothing tricks – like taking in the waistbands, armholes, and shoulder seams. Those were good tricks to learn!
Have you ever played the clothing trick game? Diane