I Know Now It’s Important

Here’s a visual for you. These pictures were taken yesterday morning.

Yes, I am within my weight range and BMI. Yes, I have lost a lot of weight. And yes, sometimes I don’t dress in the most flattering way. I did the same thing when I was heavier.

In both of these pictures I weigh approximately the same. But in the picture on the right,ย I think I look smaller than in the other picture. Why? Because of my clothing choices. I was trying to hide my body with the horrendous sunflower jumper and quite frankly, that is impossible no matter what your weight.

I know it is tempting to try to layer so many clothes on your body, or wear clothes that are too loose. I used to wear loose jumpers because they made me “feel” smaller. I think the swish of the fabric around me made me think I had lost some weight and therefore could eat a cookie or two.

As I was losing weight, I changed my attitude towards purposefully buying and wearing clothes that were too big. As my clothes got too big I threw them away or donated them to goodwill. The “worn out, too tired” to donate ones got tossed, along with the clothes that had bleach stains on them.

I purchased a few clothes along the way down the scale that fit me appropriately and I wore those until Iundergrew them. I learned that wearing too big clothing wasn’t flattering – no matter what size I was. Not at 300 pounds and not at 146 pounds.

These days I admit toย wearing my fleeces in the winter because I am always so cold in my drafty house. But, I don’t go out in public in those fleeces, but instead I wear something that fits me and is flattering. It’s usually not dressy, because that’s not my life right now – but it does fit.

I’d encourage you to wear clothes that fit and flatter your body, no matter what shape you are. I think it’s important for you to embrace who you are and where you are right now.

Have you had the tendency to hide in clothes or do you wear clothes that fit?ย  Diane

45 thoughts on “I Know Now It’s Important

  1. John says:

    A lot of times I was wearing clother that weren’t big enough for 2 reasons. I was too cheap and I WAS going to lose the weight so why waste the money. I’m betting it’s just as bad as wearing clothes that were too big?!

  2. Marcelle says:

    I cant agree with you more. I used to wear big baggy clothing to hide the fat, now I won’t be seen in them as baggy adds on kg’s and I don’t want that today…I wear clothing that fits now..what a great feeling that is as well.

  3. Marsial2010 says:

    Thanks for your post on clothing — you know how fixated I am on clothes. In your recent photos, the one on the right is very nice, but the one on the left is va-va-voom! That is how I want to look, even at my age. I threw out a few more pieces of clothing after I posted yesterday including three horrendous (once beloved) nightshirts. I guess I could have kept wearing them — big, loose comfortable, right? But then I remembered that I was wearing them 25 pounds ago. Suddenly, I didn’t want anything in my closet that I was able to wear when I was 25 pounds heavier. I want the contents of my closet to reflect me right now (and a couple of wishful items that I should be able to wear when I drop another 6 or 7 pounds). Thanks again for being such an inspiration.

  4. JourneyBeyondSurvival says:

    I’m guilty of not taking care of myself in this way. I don’t exactly know why, though the most acceptable reason is that I’m too cheap. I also don’t have a lot of time and I’m very tall so shopping is time consuming.

    It’s not an excuse though. After all, I have to wear something. It might as well fit.

  5. Marisa (Loser for Life) says:

    For as long as I can remember, I have always worn shirts that will cover my butt. Since it’s the widest part of me, I would have to find shirts that were pretty much too big for my upper half. I am a classic pear shape, so my smaller waist is the most flattering part! But, no one could tell that because my girnomous shirt would cover it. Now, in my 40’s, I’ve started to not give a hoot! My butt is what it is. No matter how thin I get, it will still be there! LOL! So, I’m embracing my curves and even showing them off a little now ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Sharon says:

    This is a tough one for me because I’m a jean and t-shirt kind of girl who doesn’t enjoy shopping no matter what size I am. I’m also the perfect example of “pear” shape with ALL my extra pounds in my hips and upper thighs so even when I have to shop and am at goal weight, it is not a pleasure – nothing fits. But yes, I do work hard to find clothes that flatter because I’m proud of the way I look when near goal. I have my share of sunflower jumpers, huge t-shirts and bulky sweaters!!

  7. Diane says:

    For me, I wear whatever shows that least amount of possible stains ! Between cleaning, doing school and cooking I am eternally spilling something on me and it usually misses any apron.Even grocery shopping involves stains- getting sprayed by those constant misters in the produce department and winding up having anything you are wearing getting soaked while trying to wrestle with those plastic bags. I have one or two “you must appear to be a real live grown up” outfits for dress, but other than that, I really don’t care about clothes. I do care about laundry though !

  8. Fran says:

    First; you should dress like you do on the left picture all the time. Show that great body of yours!

    I never hide in clothes, I always wore things that fit. If necessary I bought a bigger size. I always wear clothes of “thin” fabrics. Hardly wear sweaters because I feel fat in them. Thin fabrics make me feel much better.

    At this point where I’ve lost at least 1 size in clothes a lot of my clothes are too big but buying a new wardrobe is expensive so I still wear them and buy something new every now and then. And besides that I want to lose more weight, at least another size so I don’t buy too much otherwise I have to buy twice.

  9. Susan says:

    I like the pic of you on the left at your current weight. When I was heavier I wore the baggy clothes due to fit and coverage. Now days I wear pants/shorts with zippers and shirts that fit as well. Baggy clothes just make you look like a box and we kid ourselves wearing black and thinking that were hiding as well.

  10. Rachel Palmieri says:

    I used to go for the baggy clothes but now that I’m losing weight, I seek out the stuff that actually fits me. If it’s even the slightest bit baggy, it goes in the donate pile. Of course, one of these days I am gonna run out of clothes!

  11. Desert Agave says:

    I’ve come to dislike wearing too-big baggy clothes as well. This means that I don’t have much to wear at the moment, but I can get by with just a few outfits for now.

  12. Alissa says:

    I have a tendency to hide in my clothes. I feel a little more comfortable in clothing that isn’t as fitting. I know I look a lot thinner in clothing that fits me better, but I just have to get used to it!

    BTW, you asked on my post if they asked if they could change my writing, and they did not ask my permission. There weren’t huge changes, but there were still changes and that bothers me because it was MINE, if you know what I mean? ๐Ÿ™‚

  13. fdex says:

    off topic but your hair looks great!

    i’ve been having similar thoughts but about colour recently. wearing flattering colours will make you look younger and healthier and no more/less slim than wearing black.

  14. Jules - Big Girl Bombshell says:

    Clothes are something I am slowly working on. Yes, the “baggy” lady look, especially in the winter is a common uniform for me. Or jeans and BIG sweaters. As the image of myself changes, I see that my clothes choices are too…

  15. Mary says:

    I think for me, the attraction to baggy clothes doesn’t have so much to do with trying to look smaller as to minimize the view of “moving parts.” Bigger bodies prove the “things in motion tend to stay in motion” rule. I am extremely self conscious about bulges that bounce when I walk. LOL!

  16. Tracey @ I'm Not Superhuman says:

    Just what Stacey and Clinton would say. (Yes, I’m a What Not To Wear addict.) It’s amazing how the right clothes can slim. Still, when it’s just me and my husband and I’m around the house I’ll throw on a big sweatshirt.

  17. Dr. J says:

    And I thought clothes make the man ๐Ÿ™‚

    That is really interesting and the visuals definitely make the point. When I first became a surgeon, they didn’t have the variety of sizing in scrubs as they do now. I wore some pretty sad looking combinations then.

  18. vickie says:

    clothes that FIT are a big part of sucessful maintenance (in my opinion). Zippers and NO elastic are other big parts. Fitted clothes keep one accountable.

    I would add the importance of REALLY well fitted bras as a must have. I made it through many parts of my ‘down sizing’ with one regular bra and one sports bra. And then when I got to the end/done, I invested in a quality bra wardrobe.

  19. Margaret says:

    Good blog, as always, Diane. This is a problem for every woman, no matter what size. Finding the right clothes that fit, flatter, are good colors and “age appropriate” is a real challenge for me. If you have a good consignment shop near you, that can be a great place as you are going down in sizes. If you have some nice clothes at your larger size, you can also get some credit toward the next purchase.

  20. shauna says:

    Fanfabbytastic post Diane! I noticed recently that I started lurking in larger sweaters in denial of weight gain. Psychologically the spare fabric is comforting somehow. But it’s amazing what a well-fitting pair of jeans or tshirt can do for you, no matter what size you are.

  21. Leah says:

    Wonderful post! I tend to see so many that need the larger sizes, but I totallly see where you’re coming from. I have an outfit that I can kind of fit into now and I’m still deciding if I want to wear it or not…maybe I’ll get brave and wear it. It’s flattering and fits me – not loose. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Have a great weekend!

  22. Jill says:

    I did the same experiment this week (not on purpose though)!! Tuesday I wore a long sleeveless shirt-dress that is cute and comfy and very roomy. Today I am wearing a fitted tshirt and a knit A-line skirt – I look like I’ve lost 15 pounds in three days!! It’s amazing how clothes that fit right can make you look and feel. ๐Ÿ™‚

  23. Shawnee says:

    Sometimes when I am feeling bloated, I will wear big clothes. But just last night I bought 5 new shirts, each one a medium or a large. The last time I went shopping I was buying all larges and extra large. I haven’t lost weight, but I feel more confident and the clothes that fit look a lot better!

  24. Sunny says:

    BLACK and stretch waist-band pants were the staple of my wardrobe all the years I was overweight. It was so pathetic. Once the weight started to come off, I could wait to get rid of all of that. I didn’t save a single piece. I don’t need “reminders” of my overweight self; I had to live with her too long as it was. Funny, I wore a shockingly bright “hot pink” shirt to work middle of this week, and I haven’t heard so many compliments! Life is good! ๐Ÿ™‚

  25. 'Drea says:

    I definitely used to hide in my clothing and would not have dreamed of wearing anything form-fitting. Now, when my clothes get loose, I can hardly stand them. It’s almost like I’m eager to put the pounds that I’ve lost in the past in a hurry…

  26. Sandi says:

    I used to hide in my clothes. If they weren’t too large for me I would stretch them out so they would be. I didn’t like anything that clung to my body. Now I like things to fit right. It feels and looks so much better.

  27. Lori (Finding Radiance) says:

    I wear clothes that fit now. Even after a couple of years, I still find a lot of joy in going into pretty much any store and being able to find something flattering. I used to hate clothes shopping. Not any more!

    That difference in the first pictures is amazing at how different you look on the same day. Also looking at that long sleeve dark shirt while I am sitting in 85 and really humid makes me sweat LOL!

  28. Chris says:

    Honestly, some days if I could get away with wearing a sack and be invisible on top of it, I would! I am getting better at buying cuter clothes, though.

  29. Pam says:

    Thank you for the visual – there are so many people who try to hide themselves behind loose fitting clothes and make themselves look so much bigger. I do try to wear properly fitting clothes, even at my size.

  30. Cynthia (It All Changes) says:

    Guilty as charged. I wore the big baggy clothes constantly to show I wasn’t as fat as I thought I was. And now that I have gained some weight I am tempted to wear the big baggy stuff to hide what I have gained.

    Instead I wear clothes that fit and make me feel go because if I feel bad about myself hiding in the big clothes I won’t think I can and deserve to treat myself with the dignity to eat and live the way I know I can and want. It’s a mind body connection thing for me. I have to feel good to want to feel better. So old those baggy sweat shirts and sweat pants stay in the bottom drawers for the winters to save on my heat bill and I’m wearing what really and truly fits.

  31. Tami says:

    I love clothes, always have even when I was overweight. I have never been one to wear sweat pants or sweatshirts except for working out. I did have a phase where I wore lose fitting clothes trying to hide the bulges!

    Everyone needs to find the style that flatters their body shape. What a difference it makes as shown in your photos. I have an hour glass shape and form fitting tailored clothes flatter my shape the most and that is what I wear.

  32. Jody - Fit at 52 says:

    Great post & visual Diane!!!

    I am a mish mash. I like showing my arms as they are, to me, my best body part BUT I still like to wear looser things over the middle of my bod…. and to cover the lower tummy area…. it expands so easily with just fluids I drink or if I have to use the bathroom.. I know, TMI but this is the way my bod works.. it expands very easily even though I admit I am fit…. just the way it is.. so sometimes I wear loser in that area but show the arms… BUT, you are right Diane.

    I am clothes clueless anyways so…. I am probably doing it all wrong! ๐Ÿ™‚

  33. Tish says:

    I like things that fit. I’m probably more guilty of wearing something a bit too tight than a bit too loose. If I’m not pressed for time, I try on several different outfits to see what’s fitting today! It’s exciting.

  34. Mbini says:

    Thats so true. What I find a pain is buying clothes that fit my current size. As I am sure they wont fit in the next month. But I try to have something that fits even when I exercise.

  35. Hanlie says:

    I always take somebody (mother or sister) with me when I go shopping for clothes, because I am so aware that I when clothes don’t fit properly or don’t suit my body type, I look awful. I see it in roughly 90% of people – they look bad because they are wearing ill-fitting clothes, or clothes that are not appropriate for their shape (regardless of what shape they are!). You can get a plus-size woman who is immaculately turned out and looks great and then you can get a woman with a good figure who looks terrible because her pants are cut too low, or her bra is the wrong size, etc.

    It’s my mission to look great at every weight!

  36. Brenda says:

    I did the same thing when I was heavier! All my clothes were black and huge (button down long shirts were my favorite…never tucked in of course). I catch myself doing this now from time to time. I looked more like I was were a tent than hiding the fact that I was obese.

  37. Andrea@WellnessNotes says:

    Yes, I used to “hide” in clothes that were too big. And you are so right, it’s not flattering… I think there is nothing more important than to have a few pieces of clothes that fit right and you feel good in at all times, especially when you are losing weight. If you feel good, it’s so much easier to treat your body right and make the right food and lifestyle choices.

  38. Taryl says:

    At my very highest weight I used to hide more in clothes, but even then I was pretty conscious of fit. Thats one of the reasons I haven’t taken to skirt wearing like I want – I love the look and idea, as does my husband, but they add a TON of weight to me because I am so short, I have tl be very cautious of the style.

    In celebration of my weight loss, once I am postpartum, I finally got a great pattern template book to make my own. So an inexpensive khaki skirt with a fit that doesn’t tent-ify me is feasible :). It is honestly one of my fondest goals, to be able to wear a plain top and skirt and look cute and feminine, not fat!

  39. Kate says:

    I’ve always hidden my ‘fat self’ under big, baggy clothes. I call it my “frump mama” look. My husband noted on a few occasions how put-together one of my friends who was even heavier than I, looked, because she dressed well.

    My excuse was that I was too cheap to buy nice ‘big’ clothes. I wanted to save the money for a big shopping spree at the right size.

    What I’ve noticed lately, is that I’ve gotten a lot of comments about my weight loss; obviously because I’ve lost weight, but also, because people can actually see my shape now that I’m wearing better fitting clothes. Before I’d lost a good hunk, I just didn’t want the world to see all my lumps, bumps, and rolls.

  40. Erica says:

    I would like to add one more piece to this and it’s to have clothes altered to fit properly. Store bought clothes almost never fit right off the rack for me. Before the clothes IN MY SIZE fit right I have to spend some money on alterations for hems, waistline and hip adjustments. Before the alterations it looks like either I’m wearing granny pants up to my bust or I have a baggy backside. The extra fabric flopping around, even if the tag says it’s the right size, gives the visual of extra pounds.

    At work I have the option of wearing jeans Monday through Friday and I have noticed over time I’m less productive on those days. Since then I’ve stopped wearing jeans to work Monday through Thursday and it’s helped me get back into the work mode. I think that clothes help put me in a certain frame of mind. Work clothes for work, gunky clothes for housecleaning, baggy clothes for being relaxed (lazy?) in, etc. and I’m still working to see if the clothes I wear can help or stall my efforts to get healthy.

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