Have you ever had to purchase new clothes for an upcoming vacation or trip? How about new, bigger clothes? That’s what happened to me during the second year of our marriage. When I was first married, I wore a size 10, and never thought too much about my size. Things in the store fit me, and shopping was fun. However, during the first year and a half of my marriage, I put on about 30 pounds, until I could no longer fit into size 10’s, or 12’s. John and I shopped together, but I had become a master at hiding the size I was trying on. I’d take 3 different sizes into the dressing room, and when I came out, I’d announce – “I’m going to get this one!” I’d pay, and he’d be none the wiser.
There came a day when we planned a vacation to the Georgia mountains with two other couples. All three couples were excited about hiking, shopping, and white water rafting. Well, I wasn’t going to do the rafting, but that’s another story. As I was packing myself up for the vacation I realized with great chagrin that I didn’t have a pair of blue jeans that fit. I had kinda stopped wearing jeans because mine were too tight. I knew I really needed a pair of jeans for the vacation, so I invented an excuse to buy some.
I went into the living room and showed him my old pair. I said, “These pants are out of style, and I’d really like another pair that are more stylish.” Being the good husband that he was, he didn’t blink an eye, but said, “Sure, I’ll go with you.” I shook my head, “I’ll just run out real quick.” So I went shopping for a pair of jeans. I started with a size 14, and quickly realized that wasn’t going to work, as I couldn’t even get them over my hips. Surely it was just the particular brand, so I tried another. No go, those were even worse. Eventually I found a pair of tight 16’s and reluctantly bought those, swearing to myself that I was going to lose this marriage weight.
Once home, I got a pair of scissors out of my sewing kit, and surreptitiously cut the size tags out of the jeans, so John wouldn’t know how big a size I had to buy. Those pants were tight, but I suffered through the vacation with them. Here’s a picture of me during that trip, with my brand new size 16 pants. After the trip I did join WW, but didn’t last more than a couple of weeks before I once again went back to my poor eating habits. It would be seven more years of continued weight gain before I finally lost the weight.
Have you ever had to buy the next bigger size clothes just to “tide you over?” For me, it was a frustrating, and sometimes humiliating experience. Each time it happened it was almost as if it were happening to someone else. Who was that person in the mirror who needed a 1x, a 2x, and oh my goodness, a 3x? What happened to the normal sized woman I used to be? My clothes were always the first indication that I had once again gained more weight. First the hips got tight, then the waistband wouldn’t close, and eventually I couldn’t even get them up over my hips. Each time it happened I felt defeated and out of control.
After 10 years of bigger sizes, I finally got my food choices under control. One thing I really enjoyed was seeing the formerly tight clothes become well fitting, then loose fitting, and finally falling off. I splurged and bought myself a new pair of jeans each time the previous size got too big. It was wonderful to go into the store and look at jeans the next size down. It was even more wonderful when those jeans got too big and had to be replaced.
One thing that helped me along the way was to try and visualize what I wanted to look like. Not necessarily the number on the scale, or the size hidden in the waistband, but how I looked. Over time, by making wise food choices, exercising and carefully watching my portions, I achieved success. As you walk your journey, commit that you will no longer buy bigger sizes to “tide you over,” but rather work towards your weight loss goals while wearing those pants that may be a little tight! With daily effort, and close attention to healthy eating habits, you can have the success you desire.
What did you do when you went up in sizes? Embrace it? Fight it? Ignore it? Diane